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Palmist's Google
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CAN U BELIEVE THIS!!!   This is a real photo….

 

 The logical explanation…

 

A Lufthansa 747-400 and a United 757-200 are on a simultaneous landing approach on the parallel runways 28L and 28R at SFO.
Real runway separation is 225 meters.
Due to the telephoto distortion, the Jumbo 747 being 3 times larger than the 757 and being behind it, gives us this fantastic optical illusion that they are flying inches from each other!!!
 

 

 

Original List (age 22):

1. Handsome
2. Charming
3. Financially successful
4. A caring listener
5. Witty
6. In good shape
7. Dresses with style
8. Appreciates finer things
9. Full of thoughtful surprises
10. An imaginative, romantic lover




Revised List (age 32):

1. Nice looking (prefer hair on his head)
2. Opens car doors, holds chairs
3. Has enough money for a nice dinner
4. Listens more than talks
5. Laughs at my jokes
6. Carries bags of groceries with ease
7. Owns at least one tie
8. Appreciates a good home-cooked meal
9. Remembers birthdays and anniversaries
10. Seeks romance at least once a week




Revised List (age 42):

1. Not too ugly (bald head OK)
2. Doesn't drive off until I'm in the car
3. Works steady -- splurges on dinner out occasionally
4. Nods head when I'm talking
5. Usually remembers punch lines of jokes
6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture
7. Wears a shirt that covers his stomach
8. Knows not to buy champagne with screw-top lids
9. Remembers to put the toilet seat down
10. Shaves most weekends




Revised List (age 52):

1. Keeps hair in nose and ears trimmed
2. Doesn't belch or scratch in public
3. Doesn't borrow money too often
4. Doesn't nod off to sleep when I'm venting
5. Doesn't re-tell the same joke too many times
6. Is in good enough shape to get off couch on weekends
7. Usually wears matching socks and fresh underwear
8. Appreciates a good TV dinner
9. Remembers my name on occasion
10. Shaves some weekends




Revised List (age 62):

1. Doesn't scare small children
2. Remembers where bathroom is
3. Doesn't require much money for upkeep
4. Only snores lightly when asleep
5. Remembers why he's laughing
6. Is in good enough shape to stand up by himself
7. Usually wears clothes
8. Likes soft foods
9. Remembers where he left his teeth
10. Remembers that it's the weekend

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Revised List (age 72):

1. Breathing
2. Doesn't miss the toilet

 

JOKE- PUZZLES

 

  1. man -----------board
    Ans. = man overboard

    2. stand -----------i
    Ans. = I understand
    ok?....get the drift?

    Let's try a few now & see how you fare ???

    3. /r/e/a/d/i/n/g/
    Ans. = reading between the lines

    4.road
    a
    d
    Ans. = cross road

    5.cycle
    cycle
    cycle
    Ans. = tricycle

    6. t
    o
    w
    n
    Ans. = downtown

    7 . le /
    / vel
    /
    Ans. = split level

    8 . 0
    ------------
    M.D.
    Ph.D.
    Ans. = two degrees below zero

    9. knee
    ------------
    light
    Ans. = neon light (knee-on-light)

    10. ii ii
    -----------
    O O
    Ans. = dark circles under the eyes

    11. dice
    dice
    Ans. = paradise

    12. t
    o
    u
    c
    h
    Ans. = touchdown

    13. ground
    ---------------
    feet
    feet
    feet
    feet
    feet
    feet
    Ans. = six feet underground

    14. he's / himself
    Ans. = he's by himself

    15. ecnalg
    Ans. = backward glance

    16. death / life
    Ans. = life after death

    17. THINK
    Ans. think big !!

    18 ababaaabbbbaaaabbbbababaabbaaabbbb....
    Ans. long time no 'c' (see)

 

 

Story with a moral…

 

Terok Singh was travelling in a crowded bus. He was
carrying the passport size photograph of his son (for
college admission).?

Accidently,the photograph fell down from his pocket.
He started searching for it frantically & found it on
the floor, below the ends of a woman's saree.

He asked her "Can you lift that saree? I wanna take
photograph"

The rest is history. He was beaten so badly that he
had to be admitted to hospital. He was surprised to
see Butol Singh on the bed next to him,in a worse
condition. Butol explained what happened to him.

He had gone to a remote village to work. He finished
late and missed the last bus. He couldn't find any
hotel.

So he approached a nearby house and asked the Owner
whether he can stay there for the night. The Owner
replied "I have 2 grownup daughters.?
Sorry,I can't allow you to stay".

He approached the next house and asked whether he can
stay there for the night.The Owner replied,"I have 3
grown up daughters.? Sorry, I can't allow you to
stay".

He went to the next house and asked:" Do you have
"grown up"
daughters?".?
The Owner asked,"WHY?????????"
Butol replied, " I wanted to stay here for a
night....."
The rest is history.

THE MORAL OF THE STORY IS "WORDS GET YOU INTO DEEP
TROUBLE IF YOU DON"T USE IT CORRECTLY."